True Love After 40

Recently I've been pondering the mysteries of dating and the things that tend to confuse and discourage Singles.  I keep hearing the phrase "Love will come when you least expect it" or its twin "Love comes when you stop looking." Now, the Singles who relate this "advice" that others have given them are perplexed.  What the heck does that mean, anyway?  So, I'm supposed to stop looking and I will find love?  Or love will just leap upon me and startle me when I am busy concentrating on a great novel? 

Take another expression: "If love is meant to happen, it will just happen."  That sounds like I can just sit back and do nothing and it will just come to me without any effort on my part.  When is this ever true in the real world?  I didn't get the education I have with that attitude.  I didn't learn to play the piano believing that "if learning the piano is meant to happen, it will just happen."  Why is seeking the love of my life somehow, magically different?

"Just be yourself" is another piece of advice that I hear often.  What if "being yourself" means you dress for the beach when you're going to a formal affair because you just can't be bothered?  What if "being yourself" means you have the table manners of a chimpanzee?  What if "being yourself" means you have absolutely zero social skills?  We all have something to learn that can improve ourselves and our lives.  Most of us can improve our social graces. 

Now it's your turn: what is the worst dating advice you've recieved and what made it bad advice?

Another thing I want to know from you: I'm in the process of developing a Dating Program and I'd like to know what you would want to learn were you to attend such a program. If you want to find and keep the love of your life, you must learn all you can about yourself and what you want so you can begin to create a successful relationship.

Sign up for my Successful Singles newsletter to receive helpful tips and tools and to be kept informed about upcoming classes and workshops on the homepage at http:www.trueloveafter40.com.  Your opinions, frustrations, and questions help to form my Dating Program, so please feel free to tell me what's on your mind.

Thanks, Michelle